10.04.2010

Widow Chick's Perspective on the Perfect Man

I know, I screwed up already - there is no perfect man. There is no perfect woman, but thinking about my relationship with my dearly departed and remembering the happy times we had are coming back and I am able to see some of the things that made our relationship work. So ladies this list is for you, but realize also that you need to give what you get - so this is not one sided, just my perspective, okay?
10. You have to be a grown up - you shouldn't have to change or fix your man. He should already be the person you want to love and be fully capable of returning that love, without all the baggage from past relationships or bad decisions made in his life. We all have things like this we are dragging around, but my point here is that the man of your dreams should have overcome these obstacles and come out the other side a stronger man of character and integrity.
9. He must make you feel Hot - I think it is a man's duty to remind you every day about how beautiful you are to him. I assume that you are doing your best to keep yourself looking good no matter what your age or weight. Doing the best with what you have is important as far as I am concerned and when your man notices that and appreciates it, well, the feelings that go along with that will last a lifetime.
8. He has to make you laugh - Life is rough, a well timed laugh on a bad day can make the worst of days fill up with sunshine. Nothing is better than feeling that the world is going to end and having your wonderful man give you a big smile and spin you around the kitchen for an impromptu dance to take your mind off your troubles and put things back in perspective.
7. Priorities - No matter how important he is at work, how many people he has working under him, what his deadlines are you need to be number one. You should be number one on his speed dial list and he should always put you first when you call. I am assuming that you ladies reading this are grown up and don't call 16 times a day just to talk about the color of your nail polish.
6. Great Sex - no matter what his physical limitations there are ways that he can please you in the bedroom, or any other room of the house for that matter. He should know what turns you on and avoid the things that turn you off. He should consider everything he does from the time he wakes up in the morning to when he goes to sleep at night foreplay. Ladies appreciate the little things in life, an opened door, the dishes done, common courtesies and showing appreciation for the life she has given you is the biggest way to turn us on and I've never heard a man mention that before.
5. Butterflies - no matter how long you have been together, or how long you have been apart your man should still be able to give you that feeling that tingles up your spine, makes you warm in side and lightens your step. It's called being in love and I think it should get stronger with time, not diminish. Just my opinion.
4. Freedom - This means trust and it is difficult for men to do. I understand that many men have insecurities but ladies that are worth having are ladies worth trusting. No matter if you want to go out with your girlfriends for the night or for the weekend. Trust and support are a must.
3. Complete Adoration - that means that every little quirk of your personality, every insecurity, every lump and bump and sag of your body should be completely adored by your man. When you love someone you love them for everything they are including the flaws and all of us have them. Sometimes they drive you crazy but to know and understand that is how she is and love her and her flaws are just part of the package in my honest opinion.
2. A safe place - No matter what your mood ladies, somber and dark one day, singing and dancing through the house the next - your man should be the kind that won't send out for the straight jacket when your moods change. He should be someone you are so comfortable around that you don't feel the need to hide anything about yourself.
1. Patience, generosity and consideration - these things go hand in hand. Patience to deal with lifes frustrations in a calm and productive way. Generosity of every aspect of your lives. From sharing money to sharing a meal he should be willing to give and share with you. Consideration for me is the biggest one I think I have been dealing with lately. I think he should be considerate enough to realize that the decisions he makes everyday effect not only him but you as well. It is important that he be considerate of your thoughts and feelings as well but more importantly I don't think many men think about how the things they do every day effect the women they love. If they did, they might live longer, be healthier, happier men. Because after all as women all we really want is our men to stick around for awhile and share old age with us.

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